Thursday 9 January 2014

Ssshhhhh - let me think!

Wow has it really been that long since I last tried this blogging thing? Oh well that's in the past and 2014 has to be about looking forward.

For that reason I decided to join in with the Bead Journal Project on Facebook this year(https://www.facebook.com/#!/groups/177095035820297/).  The project was conceived by Robin Atkins and the idea is to produce 1 piece of bead embroidery each month that expresses how you are feeling or just what's going on in your life at that time. 

My January BJP piece is called 'Ssshhhhh - let me think!'. 
In November 2013 I experienced one of the top 5 stresses in life - I lost my job.  I was made redundant from my job of 10 years.  It hurt and I am still recovering both emotionally and psychologically from this life event.

What hurts most however is what I am doing to myself.  My inner voice of self-doubt and self-criticism just keeps getting louder and louder.  Now she was always there - my little voice - but now she has pom-poms and is doing a constant cheerleader thing through me.  She is my constant companion.  She invades what little sleep I get.  She is relentless.

I don't want to silence her completely, but I need to work towards lowering her volume and 'Ssshhhhh - let me think!' is my first step towards that.  I am hopeful that she will let me follow new paths this year, be they beading, career or life choices.  I am hopeful that she will let me shine again.

I have also made her heart shaped as a reminder to love myself - something that I am not good at just yet.  
Well that's my January out of the way. I hope you have enjoyed seeing her and please visit the Facebook page to see the journeys of others.

Thank you for reading.




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